Second Chance Introductions

The Singles Market

A question on the lips of many single, divorced or unattached people .... Where do they go to meet the right partner?

There are more than 11.5 million single, divorced and widowed people in the UK aged 25 to 79 with the vast majority of these people being quite normal in appearance, intelligence and social skills. There are, however, few channels available for these people to meet each other.

In one's teens and early twenties, when being single is the norm, social events of all types provide the opportunity to meet potential partners. However, as people grow older, friends pair off and being part of a couple is seen as the "normal state", with people from the age of twenty-five to thirty-five years finding it increasingly difficult to meet other single people and they often feel out of place at events where everyone is part of a couple.

The problem is even worse for people who have been married and find themselves on their own again after many years of having a partner. The responsibility of children can only heighten the dilemma and some people experience a change of attitude from their married friends once they are single again, with the married couple feeling awkward and even threatened by the person's new single status.

Often the only opportunity for meeting potential partners is at work, but again a large percentage are already married or in stable relationships and nowadays it is often inappropriate to become involved with work colleagues.

Then there is the luck method but the chance of meeting someone in a wine bar, restaurant or other public place, is like winning the lottery .... a chance in several million! Or you could try your luck pushing your shopping trolley around a supermarket, but as this involves the "chat up" method and many singles have been out of practice at this, it could be a none starter.

Many unattached people have joined singles, separated and divorced clubs, where everyone meets at a disco type event, but these clubs simply supply the event and not potential partners, with no effort being made to check out marital status.

So where do singles go from here? You could try the advertisements for Lonely Hearts in the local paper and many do, but many find that the descriptions given by those replying could be in breach of the Trades Description Act! ... Most of the males likening themselves to George Clooney or Mel Gibson and the females Cindy Crawford or Julia Roberts (they obviously have not looked in the mirror recently).

Then you could try a dating agency where you pay a joining fee and receive 5-6 names, addresses and telephone numbers of the opposite sex. It's then up to you to get in touch, but you will be competing with other members of your sex .... May the best man (or lady) win! And of course there is no security check on any individual.

A major step beyond that is Introduction Bureaux where members are screened to prove they are who they say they are and to establish their requirements for matching purposes. Bureaux who interview all new applicants where they are made to feel comfortable and able to be themselves, gives a greater insight into the requirements of their clients therefore improving greatly their success rate.

Once they become a member, they are introduced regularly to compatible members of the opposite sex being matched by age group, height, smoker/non smoker and other factors, and these with their other interests are recorded on their personal profile. After each introduction, their requirements are analysed to enable further matching to be even more accurate until hopefully they get into a long term relationship with the gentleman/lady of their dreams.

So help is at hand, with these wide range of services and methods, the questions you need to ask are - Can I meet someone on my own? Do I need help and if so what? And finally if I do not do anything now, where will I be in one years time, in two years time, in three years time .... probably in the same situation and three years older!